CARRIE’S DIARY, June 2016
What do you do when you are so tired of dealing with the nonstop overwhelm and chaos that you don’t have the energy to ask for help?
– Because explaining what you are going through is too much—you aren’t even able to grasp all of it yourself, otherwise you would not be overwhelmed?
– Because you are afraid of making others uncomfortable and feel guilty about their privileges—although sometimes you also feel like shouting at them, ‘Don’t you realize how f… lucky you are you can sleep the whole night through if you want to?!’
– Because you are ashamed, because there is always someone else worse of or someone else just as worse off but doing better, so surely you must be doing something wrong?
It feels like we’ve been here before, and that’s probably true.
It’s the world of a special needs parent, and if you are in it, you know only more love can see you through.
You just have to find the strength for it.
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58-040624
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Cover photo by Motoki Tonn on Unsplash
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Song: The Brand New Heavies – “More Love” (thanks to Adelaide Dupont for the suggestion)
Thanks for reading! Feel free to share your thoughts, comments or experiences!
Comments
8 responses to “Catch the 22”
Well, that didn’t last long … remember how I wrote the other day that things had cleared a little bit? That was yesterday. I shan’t say anymore of it, because I think Carrie expresses it better. And that’s just the usual slice … of all things.
Anyway, I have a mind of doing more diary entries like this, social media posts, etc. from Carrie and co. Each with his or her unique perspective on something that feels like it has to be said. Maybe it’s about politics. Maybe just family chaos. Maybe how beautiful the sunlight is this morning.
There would still be longer stories, of course, but this feels like the right addition. I hope it is.
And I hope this day gets better.
For you, too.
Chris
Remembering a song from when I was younger:
“More Love” from Baha – it was on the “Sliding Doors” soundtrack.
A very good format for our times.
More love – more strength – more energy.
All the moving parts in the first bullet.
And the moment that Carrie said “It feels like we’ve been here before – and that’s probably true”.
Have just remembered that MORE LOVE comes from The Brand New Heavies – sadly a band that I have not heard again.
It’s been ages since I heard TBN. I should like to find some more music for a story. Thanks for reminding me … !
PS I just listened to it and really liked it! I have added it as the song for this post 🙂
Turned out that on YouTube without too much looking there was a playlist of THE BRAND NEW HEAVIES.
[it would have been an effort on the person making it!]
MORE LOVE does have a groove to it as I am sure you have experienced.
The line which caught me as a younger person:
Also
And
It’s interesting to see the bands and the people connected to Brand New Heavies – Jamiroquai and Chaka, for instance.
And the Luxfunkers!
This. Thank you, Chris. You’ve nailed it
Thanks for confirming. I wish I hadn’t though 🙂